Though it has been the loneliest and most difficult year of my life, God has proven so faithful! He continues to amaze me with His love and goodness. People are fickle, life is hard but God knows just where you supposed to be and who you are meant to be.

Thank the Lord, He placed me close to my family! This year would be so much harder without them.

'They', whoever 'they' are, were right, going through PA school is hard. I thought I'd make friends and we could go through this tough test of studying medicine together but I've found that the only one I can truly depend on is the Lord alone. Friends may come and go but very few will put aside their selfishness and jealously to really stand with you through the years. I treasure my friendships that have lasted through years, some since childhood, some since high school, some since college. Though we do not communicate often, when we meet up it's like we never missed a day away! True friends are hard to find. Sometimes though we need to learn to completely trust in God alone. It's never people, past successes, our own intelligence, money, status, or stuff that can ever save us, nothing but the blood of Jesus. Nothing but the name of Jesus, nothing but the Lord God my Savior can save us. Yes, it is my complete belief in a loving, Heavenly Father God that is my light and my salvation through this life. Sometimes life draws us closer to our Maker. 

People or God, Fear or Faith

At times in life we need to go back to words of encouragement and faith. I like to go back to the Word of God, praise and worship, and messages that remind me of God's love and faithfulness. I was thinking of writing on faith, courage and fear as it's what I've been thinking about lately but it's still a work in progress. As I was opening up a new word document I went back to my previous writings to see if I had written something about this to see if I can encourage myself too! :) I ran across this piece of writing, it always encourages me. These words from one of my Dad's messages remind me of the story of our lives. Living out a life of faith and courage despite our human nature of fear and natural circumstances. I read these words and realize the greatness of God that has fulfilled His awesome promises in our lives. 

It doesn't matter what people say or do, doesn't matter if people reject you, gossip about you, or turn their backs to you. It doesn't matter where you come from, your past or present or what your qualifications are. God uses a widow's mite, the young and old, the rich and poor, a fearful young man, an orphan girl and the foolish of this world to confound the wise. There are precious seasons in our lives that we go through, taking us to a greater level in our life in Christ. The path is lonely, wearisome, rocky and a little scary but it's a challenge you courageously step into. Take 'Courage, Dear Heart' and be sure that the voice you hear guiding you through this stormy path is a Great One in whom your faith is placed. 

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"The Story of Our Lives"

The smell of the stuffy confined quarters of the press was almost suffocating. The fermenting odors of the wine enveloping the young man, bent over, threshing wheat. He was hiding from his Nation’s oppressors. Suddenly someone appears seemingly from nowhere and calls him, “mighty warrior”. This young man did not seem like a mighty man of valor, he was hiding in his father’s winepress, he doubted the Angel of the Lord, was depressed and honestly he had little bit of an inferiority complex! Yet Gideon was whom the Lord had used to lead an army of 300 men to restore a Nation. 

Elegant, rich tapestries decorated the place she was now residing in, the opulence and grandeur was overwhelming. She had no father, nor mother. A relative raised her in humble surroundings, nothing like what encased her now. Her background and ethnicity kept a secret so she could stay alive. Her beauty may have been what caught one’s eye, but character set her apart. Her obedience and courage allowed God to use her to save a Nation. 

With war at their borders and fear in their hearts, Jehosophat faced the unknown but believed in a known and awesome God. Facing the battle at hand the King took up the challenge placed before him and sought something, someone greater. Gathering all, they fought first on their knees, knowing victory is only given through God their Savior. 

Every individual person has the call of God on his or her life; that is their significance in God’s kingdom. We all experience fear when we face new challenges and responsibilities but it is the way in which we approach them that makes the difference. There are times we all want to do something but feel inadequate. Surprisingly all it takes is just one small step forward to change the way we think and the ability to seek God’s counsel, to organize and be aligned with Heavenly guidance, as Gideon, Esther and Jehosophat did.

Esther took the leadership challenge placed before her; she did not surrender her leadership or faith to fears or the law. God has given each of us a challenge and call on our lives; He has also given us all we need. Each one of us has to step out of our comfort zones to complete God’s call on our life, which is our significant contribution in God’s Kingdom.

Do we first come together and seek God’s counsel as Esther did and even as Jehosophat did? As we face these challenges, we put our faith in the God who alone created the heavens and the earth.

- Faith, is not surrendering to the outside forces.
- Faith, is saying, “If I perish, I perish. I know the Lord will make a way for me.”
- Faith, is not surrendering to faces by saying, “How can I go to this person?”
- Faith, is not surrendering to obstacles or frustrations.
- Do not surrender faith to fears.
- Do not surrender to fatigue!
- Faith, is not surrendering to falsehoods. In reality, we may not have the ability to go to the king and redeem the people, but Faith is trusting in the un-provable.
- Faith, is not surrendering to forecasts of what people may say.
- Do not surrender to fracturing experiences, flattering experiences, or fantasies. They may lead you away from God’s plan. 

Do surrender your faith to God. Faith is saying I am coming in the Name of my God; as David in the Bible ran toward Goliath with a small slingshot and five smooth stones. 

God overcomes human weakness and failure to elevate our position and rank all the way to His throne room. You can never underestimate the potential of one encounter. A few moments in the presence of the King of Kings (God who alone created the heavens and the earth) can change your destiny. 

Speak now or forever hold our peace…

I remembered this piece I wrote a couple of years ago for IPF and wanted to re-post it as it seems relevant.


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Looking out the window one can see the bombed out buildings all the way down the deserted city street. Only a few women and children scurry out quickly to gather necessities back home. Men cautiously walk through the streets to complete their business for the day. Few of the beautiful architectural structures that once stood prominently representing its cultural heritage now lay in rubble. The landscapes which captured the hearts of many a traveler are hidden under the dense atmosphere of war and terror. Armies and soldiers set the ambiance wielding weapons that make our hearts beat just a little faster with apprehension. 

Destroyed by the years of war the historical Churches now remain in pieces of its previous magnificence. History is taking an unprecedented turn to another continuous bout of political tension. Freedom now lies only in the hearts of the people. Salvation is not heard from the voices now silenced. Courage tested by cowering under tables while the walls tremble from gun shots. 

I see today a multitude of countries and people facing this daily torment of uncertainty. Where are the Christians? The tables are turning; the stones are now being cast at those who are standing up for faith and truth. Lives are lost without knowing the salvation in the name of Jesus. We live in a place where one would rather conform than be set apart. They conform to the images and status quo of the media and societies opinion. 

What do you see? More importantly what do you do? 

Where are you going in life? Who are you inspiring in this life? What are you doing for…yourself...or for the Lord? 

Speak now or forever hold your piece. There is no other time than this. Speak up for those losing their souls. Do not keep quiet for what…a short period of pleasure? 

There’s more to life than [insert here any number of the short lived pleasures pushed and vouched for the infamous and jaded glamor of this world] Why go with the status quo? Why not live to be different, to realize our real purpose in life is to worship the Lord. To have abundant life through His unfailing love and grace. Why go with the flow, when we can be so much more?

I see hope…a hope for our future. Do not give in, do not give up, and do not keep quiet. Speak up for Christ. We live not for ourselves but for others; that is what we are all about, not trying to be like anyone else, just Jesus. We should stick out, our words, our actions; our character should resemble the beat, the music, the dance, of a different drummer. Why push the boundary line? Get to a place where beneficial versus permissible is clearly understood. Millions are lost and billions more are waiting. 

“…And they are waiting for you, waiting for me; to open our hands so He can pour them [God’s love] out. But why would God trust us with these treasures these precious children of His? Because God calls us family, He can trust us. Because we have seen the otherness of God and we long for more! For if you, God, were the same as the rest You would not be holy and my un-holiness craves your holiness, your cleansing. You!  

Then in the process, we become ‘other’ ourselves; and the importance of that? [Otherness, is what we are about, to look outside ourselves and reach out with God’s love] There are so many stories [societal attractions] being told, vying for my affections, my passions, my heart, but I refuse to be caught up in the midst of small stories that seem brilliant at the moment, but soon become faded glory. I desire to be taken up into God’s story and into God [Your] great plot for me and mankind.  So I can leap into the chariot of fire. And I ask for humility and courage to leave it all behind. No matter the cost! Because Lord, You deserve it…and they need it. Because I love You…and they need You. 

And the spirit and the bride are still crying out…Come Lord Jesus and You will. You always do.”

Quoted from World Mandate 2005 – ACC, [Otherness]